Uncategorized | Aug 1, 2009
Embarrassing stories AND free stuff. Yep, this post has it all.
By Angela Watson
Founder and Writer
Embarrassing stories AND free stuff. Yep, this post has it all.
By Angela Watson
Most teachers enter the profession completely unprepared for all the complexities of running a classroom. I think at some point, we’ve all been faced with an unforseen challenge and wondered incredulously, Geez, I never knew I was supposed to plan for or anticipate this issue: how am I expected to have a solution for a problem I didn’t know existed? Personally, I’m astounded by the sheer number of basic classroom management lessons I had to learn the hard way:
-Communicating effectively with parents requires a concerted effort and a much greater time investment than I’d assumed. Once I carefully scheduled eight parent conferences back-to-back and stayed at school until 6 pm (by myself–which was perhaps the dumbest part of the whole scenario) and was furious when every single parent was a no-show. Why the poor turn out? Because I’d scheduled the conferences two weeks prior and didn’t know I needed to provide forty-seven notes, emails, and phone messages as a follow-up reminder. Now that I’ve learned to send notices via every form of communication except sky writing and smoke signals, my no-show rate has become much more reasonable.
-Letting third graders keep scissors in their desks is generally a bad idea. It took the following catastrophes for me to reach that conclusion: one child’s impromptu trimming of her own bangs without the benefit of a mirror; a boy’s decision to snip two braids off a girl’s elaborate and expensive style that took five hours to create; and a third child’s unexplainable propensity toward slicing the file folder centers I spent three weeks making. That was all in one semester. After that, I decided to keep the scissors in one communal area and distribute them only when needed (which was as infrequently as possible with that group, believe me). Even now, I still have to be extra cautious during scissor activities, and have a responsible kid do a scissor count after they’ve been collected. Failure to do so may result in some little sneakster using his scissors to either trim textbook page edges, sharpen pencils using the blade edge (!!), or carve the word ‘fart’ into his desktop.
-Photocopies MUST be made as far in advance as possible. There is nothing more disappointing than getting a brainstorm and working all evening on a fabulous activity for the next day’s lesson, only to be stuck assigning something boring from the textbook because there’s either no paper or all the copiers are down, AGAIN. I once had an amazing math activity with Halloween candy that I couldn’t get copied for FIVE WEEKS. I busted out the worksheet on Valentine’s Day and told the kids to replace the words black and orange with red and pink and change all the pumpkins into hearts. Needless to say, the kids weren’t buying it. Although, since their behavior was top notch the whole day in anticipation of eating the candy afterward, all was not completely lost. And I picked out my Cinco de Mayo activities the following morning.
So tell me: what classroom management lesson did YOU learn the hard way? Your story can be short or long, funny or serious, embarrassing or matter-of-fact…just share the true tale of a mistake or misunderstanding you experienced while trying to manage a classroom.
Leave your story as a comment on this post. I’ll select a winner on Wednesday, August 5th, and send out a free copy of my book The Cornerstone: Classroom Management That Makes Teaching More Effective, Efficient, and Enjoyable. Inside, I explain all the stuff I had to learn from trial and error–managing small groups, organizing materials, getting kids to follow basic procedures, handling test pressure–so that you can learn specific steps for creating the learning environment you’ve always wanted. It’s a practical guide that will show you how to construct a self-running classroom that frees you to TEACH.
The book will ship via Priority Mail so the winner should have it in plenty of time to read before the new school year begins (unless you’re in one of those schools that’s already starting back, in which case, I can only offer you my deepest sympathy).
I’m looking forward to your stories! Thanks for sharing!
Angela Watson
Founder and Writer
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My first year as a computer teacher a second grader (who I swear is Dennis the Mennace incarnate) came up to me before class and asked "Can I lick the chocolate off of my headphones?" Confused, I asked for clarification "why is there chocolate on your headphones?" He answered with a, "they were in my pocket." As if that should solve the mystery. "So can I lick the chocolate off?" I needed more clarification, "why do you have chocolate in your pocket?" Now he looked like a deer caught in the headlights: "Because I'm not allowed to eat chocolate, my mom says it makes me hyper. So I sneaked chocloate into my pocket and then when I need a little I stick my fingers in and lick the chocolate off. I forgot which pocket it was in and put my headphones in there so I didn't have to carry them down the hall. Now they have chocolate all over them and I want to lick it off." Lesson 1: There is always a perfectly reasonable explination (in a child's mind) for any strange act they may committ. Lesson 2: Collect and hand out headphones, left to their own devices the headphones will be chewed on, stuffed into pockets, and licked after getting covered in melted chocolate. Lesson 3: know your audience, I had to be on my toes with this class!
The same student came to school the next day and informed me that he had been grounded from watching TV. I naturally assumed that this was a bi-product of melted chocolate in the washing machine. However, when I asked why he got grounded he said, "For burrying the remote control in the backyard." When I asked why he did it he responded "I was playing hide and go seek with my dog."
As I said Dennis the Mennace incarnate! I do miss teaching him, it was never a dull moment 🙂
Okay, forgive me but after reading Brittany's comment I have to add one more lesson learned. I too had a student who could not sit still for anything. He was the biggest boy in my second grade class and constantly moving around, adjusting in his seat and rolling around on the floor. If you could get him to complete a task, you would find that he was one of the brightest students in the class. He needed to move to learn. I learned to let him move while I taught, it kept him focused on what I was teaching and not on trying to stay still. One day he was wearing those pants that button up both sides. I was teaching math and he was in the back of the classroom climbing on his seat and sliding down the back. The next time I looked up he was standing next to his seat with his pants around his ankles in his underwear! During his adjusting, the pants got caught on the chair and all the buttons unsnapped. He stood frozen until I gave him a wink and kept teaching. He quickly gathered his pants and hid behind my desk. None of the other kids had even noticed. After the lesson I went looking for him and found him trying to button the pants back up…it was not going well. I quickly helped him and wrote a note home to let mom know that although very comfortable, these were not ideal pants for her son.
This is going to sound terribly boring but I would say that the biggest lesson I have learned with classroom management is the management of paperwork and resources. I have to echo what you say, Angela, about running copies as far in advance of the lesson as possible. For me I always felt like I was chasing my tail (and wasting so much time) trying to get organized in the classroom without really knowing HOW to do it. So for example, not being able to find an overhead transparency several minutes into a literacy lesson = anxious teacher, bored kids. Not being able to find a parent's new cell phone number because I scribbled it on the back of an envelope then placed that envelope …hmm…somewhere. Really it was the Cornerstone book that helped me with so much of this. I used to think that being organized meant putting papers in a neat pile on top of my desk.
Whoever wins the book is a lucky person; it was one of my best investments. I'm about to take it off the shelf and dig-in again, to get ready for the new school year.
My first year teaching I taught sixth grade. I had a student ask to use the restroom. He didn't have his hall pass book so I told him to have a seat. He did not appear to be in any dire need to go. A few minutes later, I was teaching and noticed a terrible smell. Several students around him were laughing. I thought he was just passing gas. I finally asked what was going on because the students were laughing so much. They pointed across the way at a girl's desk a few rows over. A strange-colored, gooey substance was on her desk chair. Never thinking about what it could be, I told her to get a paper towel and wipe it off. The laughter was still not stopping, but I pressed on and finished the lesson. Finally, class was dismissed and I pulled a very trustworthy student to the side and said, "Honey, what in the world was everyone laughing about?" She said, "______ pooped in his pants." I looked at her kind of strange and was quite at a loss for words. Then she continued, "She put his hands in his pants and flung it." My jaw dropped even further to the floor. I said, "Wait…so that stuff on ____'s chair was….poop? He put his hands in his pants and flung poop across two aisles?" She nodded. I looked in the trash at the paper towel she had thrown away and sure enough…poop. Thankfully the assistant principal's office was just down the hall and we were able to get the student up to the office quickly, although he was probably uncomfortable in more ways than one. All in all that day, I learned that sometimes, it's okay to make exceptions for restroom use. Sixth graders are not too old for accidents. And never ask a student to clean up anything that looks suspicious. Never.
I hope the above story was not confusing. The boy had the accident. It got thrown on a girls' chair and she cleaned it off..before i knew what it was..